Some background: Moo

I have always wanted to adopt. I tried to convince my parents to adopt when I was a teenager (they didn't cooperate, though!).

I told myself that if I was still single when I was 35 that I would start the process to adopt. Well, 35 rolled around and I was still single. But, adoption is expensive and I didn't know if I could afford it. Then,  I met someone who adopted through foster care. She have me the name of her agency and in May of 2007 I called them. I had all my paperwork filled out by August and started training in September. By December I was officially a licensed foster parent!

I got my first placement call right before Christmas. I said yes, but DYFS said no because I lived too far from the placing county and the baby still had visits with her mom. I offered to transport the baby to her visits, but it was a no go. I received my second call about a month later: a 2 year old. Unfortunately, I couldn't take her because I lived in a 1 bedroom apartment and licensing rules stated only babies under 2 could be in the same room as an adult. Then came the call for my Moo.

It was February of 2008...around 11 am. I was at lunch (I am a teacher, all my friends at work knew I was waiting for a call, and many of them were there when I got THE CALL). It was magical when I got the call. A 10 day old baby boy, fost-adopt situation, no visitations yet ordered by the judge. My colleagues were ecstatic!!! And so was I, although I was initially wary because of my previous calls and non-placements. When DYFS called again asking if I wanted the initial clothing check I knew this was actually going to happen!!! They said the baby would arrive by 3 pm. Yikes!!! I had nothing for a newborn. I left work early to pick up the essentials (although my head was spinning so much that I didn't get all I needed; but, some good friends were thinking clearly and brought over extra clothing that night). Of course, DYFS being DYFS and having their own timetable, the baby didn't arrive until 6:30. I was on pins and needles thinking he wasn't going to come.

Around 6:30 that night a tiny baby boy was brought to my doorstep. He came with only the clothes he was wearing and some bottles from the hospital that he had just been discharged from. He still had all his little hospital bracelets on! Once inside, he started screaming his little head off. The workers, having no paci for him, had stuffed the nipple of a baby bottle with some paper to make a make-shift pacifier. He was having nothing of that pacifier. Thankfully, I had picked up a newborn paci and after giving it to him he calmed down. Then, the workers and I sat down (little Moo safely in my arms) and we signed some paperwork. Then they left. And I was alone with my (yet unknown to me) future son.

I sat in the rocker and studied his beautiful little face. He studied me right back. Then I read him the book Guess How Much I Love You (because, well, I am a teacher and OF COURSE I was going to read to this little baby). These moments are forever ingrained in my memory. He has the most amazingly expressive eyes. I could see a sense of peace in his eyes while I rocked him that night. It is so amazing that such a small infant can sense safety; yet, he did. He, from that moment forth, became my life.

There is so much more to the story, but that is enough for now. More to come...